I haven't posted in a while partially because I was away on my honeymoon, but partially because I wasn't sure what direction I wanted to go with having this blog . I was feeling like I needed some clarity in order for me to continue and have the energy to give all of myself to the writing for the benefit of the readers. I feel fortunate to have found that clarity. Let me explain.
Best Part of my Honeymoon
When I got back from my honeymoon people kept asking me, "What was the best part of your trip?" I'd answer the typical answers of, "The beaches, the snorkelling, the elephant rescue sanctuary, the food,"...And all that was true and nifty.
But having thought about the question and my own feelings, the greatest blessing was that my greatest weaknesses were magnified and made clear to me. It was fun the travelling and sightseeing, but backpacking through Asia, in a different land, with a language barrier, one need only to live life in order to confront daily discomfort, challenges and for me anxiety of dealing with people.
I am lucky. I have a loving wife who understands the situation and frequently covers my mistakes. She's a sweet, soul and very good with people. I like to think we compliment each other with our strengths and weaknesses.
What I often perceived as catastrophes, were gently made to rest as natural hiccups inevitable when travelling, as perceived by my wife. So again I am fortunate to have such a splendid and caring companion.
Before our trip, I was definitely having an internal struggle on my writing -how to start the blog, how i could reach people, how I could eventually make a career in my writing, and how would I learn all the ins and outs running a successful blog...but following my honeymoon I realize I cannot have a successful career in any industry, let alone, help others if I don't first take care of what needs to be taken care of.
The whole point of this blog was to document my struggle with anxiety and hopefully my ability to overcome or manage it in a healthy way while still moving forward with my life and going after goals important to me. It's great to write about my life and my past experiences but I hadn't really been committed to pushing myself to take measures in order to continue to grow myself and my life.
Well as I stated, that changes when backpacking, on a different continent. Although, I was nervous and uncomfortable, I experienced a lot, learned about myself and my relationship and had one of the best times of my life.
Re-Up and My Magna Carta
Coming back I've rededicated myself to personal development, helping others with similar struggles, and sharing my journey with the world.
It's working. I'm beginning to find some resolution to some of those inner dialogues I had a few months ago and it feels amazing.
With that, I'd like to share what is perhaps the first evolution of my Magna Carta.
My passions are self-development, business, spirituality, boxing and live music. I love watching Canucks and UFC. I have a passion for Music Production but I cannot develop that skill yet at this stage of life due to resources and time. I like writing and can develop into a top tier writer. I am also very literate and love reading. Honing this skill along with my passion for self-development will allow me to be the face and brand of a powerful web based knowledge business about overcoming (or perhaps, more so, accepting and living with anxiety) while still chasing and fulfilling ones dreams. Other hobbies and trivial things I can pursue in life as my resources allow but they are not yet passions such as archery, yoga, music, performance arts, and travel. Of course close and nurturing family, friends mentors and mentee's will begin to form a crucial and supportive pillar in my life and I in theirs. Time spent with people and becoming a thought leader in the field of mental health and the self are also goals to be kept top of mind. But at least for now I have defined and narrowed and clarified my true passions in life. Namely self development business spirituality boxing and live music.
Plow! There it is. It feels great to know myself right now and have a foundation to build my life upon.
I will learn to handle my anxieties and emotions, deal with them appropriately and continue to live my life and achieve goals and dreams I've set for myself. Then I will teach and help others, they too can live with their anxieties and live amazing lives they've dreamed of.
I'm tired of being the guy with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, and being know for avoiding and and all types situations. I'm not a leper. And even if I were I'd still deserve to live my life how I choose.
So, brothers and sisters, anxiety-sufferers and lepers alike, time to start living! It's scary but it'll be worth it...and a lot more fun! (I hope ;p ) PEACE!